Assalamu’alaikum Beans! 🙂 #PeaceBeUponYou
Subhan’Allah, it has been over a month since I have last posted, :O I AM SOOOO SORRY! but I have been really busy with revision. 😥 I have finally finished my exams so I thought this would be the best time to make a small post on something that we may face on a regular basis – gossiping or what we may know as backbiting.
Hmmm …we all cannot deny that one way or another we have experienced a group gossip, whether it would be in school, work or even in our own homes. As we grow into our teenage years, hormones start flying everywhere. Our feelings and emotions are heightened which could be the spark for starting a backbiting session. My question is WHY?! 😦
Personally I have seen different kinds of friendship groups and in every group; there is a particular agenda. I have understood that staying in a group, every member is trying to gain something that will benefit them in some way. Correspondingly, a lot of time is dedicated to the group we stay with, so that means each member will try and make every moment worthwhile. Some people spend time with each other for good reasons such as sharing similar hobbies, or helping each other study or even reminding each other about Islam. Other groups however, are there for sad reasons like to feed each other’s own desires – this is where backbiting comes in.
Backbiting is when two or more people talk about someone in a negative way while they are not present. Even if the content of the gossip were to be true, it is still backbiting. This is because, if you were to say it front of that person, it will result in their feelings getting hurt. We can also be part of backbiting by simply just being present and listening to the gossip. So we can see that the WHOLE concept of gossiping is wrong, whether you are giving some input or just being there to listen. 😦 We all know deep inside that gossiping itself is not good – you do not have to be a Muslim to know that, yet why do we still do it?
It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said:
“Do you know what gheebah (backbiting) is?” They said, “Allah and His Messenger know best.” He said, “Saying something about your brother that he dislikes.” It was said, “What if what I say about my brother is true?” He said, “If what you say is true then you have backbitten about him, and if it is not true, then you have slandered him.” [Muslim]
This sort of vile activity is done to gain temporal pleasure, which can cause an addiction. Some groups spend majority of their time backbiting as their “fun regular activity”… LOL, it sounds as if I’m talking about a bunch of people who are drug addicts. Well in all seriousness – this could be on the same level, maybe even worse.
What does Islam say about backbiting?
“neither backbite one another. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his dead brother? You would hate it (so hate backbiting). And fear Allah. Verily, Allah is the One Who forgives and accepts repentance, Most Merciful” [49:12]
To backbite about someone, in Islam it is taken as a sin. So imagine this beans – every time we slander a person, we are sinning. Every breath we exhaled to say something bad about someone else – we have basically wasted the oxygen in the air -_- We can clearly see in this verse that if someone backbites, it is as if we are eating the flesh of our own brother. Blaggghhhh that thought makes me want to become a vegetarian After knowing that, why would we waste our precious time, slandering people off? Subhan’Allah. Do we not have something else better to do? If only we saw the bigger picture. One-day beans, we will die and the All Mighty will judge us. We act as if death will happen later on, maybe when we are 70 or 80 years old and before then we can repent. I am telling you now; we can die ANYTIME at ANYPLACE and imagine the last thing we spoke about before dying was that so and so ugly Jordan shoes. Gosh – those Jordan shoes is not worth your Jannah 😛 but if we only knew.
OK – some of us are maybe in a situation where we want to stop talking about others but do not know how to avoid it. First and foremost, let us repent to Allah; ask him for forgiveness, as he is the Most Merciful, The Most Gracious. Second, those gossip groups that we are in…do not expect a change from them; rather we need to change ourselves first. If we can take ourselves out from that situation – just do it. Do not worry about losing friends and being alone – we need to have trust in Allah that he will make new friends for us that will be worth our time and space. That effort and sacrifice that we do in order to please Allah, just know that he has many rewards waiting for us.
My fellow beans, we are just too precious – too precious to be sinning over something that could be easily avoided. 😦 Let me give a reminder that on the Day of Judgment, every person we have spoken about will have the right to take a portion of our good deeds. So just imagine the amount of people we have gossiped about, we will end up being bankrupt front of Allah where there will be no more good deeds left to show Him. Subhan’Allah.
It is not too late to change; it is not to late to run back to Allah. We need to be careful of the people we hang around with, because merely we are just a pure reflection of them. 🙂
~ Until next time…
P.S “Backbiting? Purrr’leaseee – Ain’t noooobodyy got time for thaaaaat” 😛 haha – sorry I couldn’t resist.